I cannot get it out of my head. It is all I can think about. Wake up, brat, go to work, brat, eat dinner, brat. It has quickly invaded my lexicon to the point where I find myself exclaiming “bumpin’ that,” “I’m so julia,” and “she is a radiant mother, he is a beautiful father” over and over again. Yes, after gestating with the album for some time, it is an instant classic. The branding, the aesthetic, the nod to early 2000’s dance music. It is everything. The cover that was initially panned by some fans (haters) has become an almost infinite multiplier from a branding perspective. Anything remotely close to the puke-green color is prompting twitter users to ask “brat promo?" Real angels (Charli fans) know that her patented hyperpop has always been a combination of this dance music and more forward thinking electronics. See Pop 2, Charli, and How I’m Feeling Now. That is my one gripe with the album. It is less future nostalgia and more pure nostalgia. Nevertheless it contains some of her c*ntiest and most infectious songs to date.

Everything was fine and dandy until literal Mussolini (Taylor Swift) attacked. As brat’s chart success was skyrocketing, Taylor knew she had to do something. Her plan, release another stupid edition of the tortured farters department exclusively in the UK. This successfully blocked brat from being Charli’s second number 1 album in the UK. I have lost count of how many versions of this forsaken, bloated, album Taylor has released. It seems that she is trying to inflate her already absurd chart success. Two points might not be strong enough to make a trend but she did pull a similar stunt earlier in the month to block Billie Eilish’s new album from number 1 status. I don’t really care about chart success but these moves from Taylor are appearing very anti-feminist and very pro-greed. I am ready to be sent against Taylor Swift in battle.

Here is my track-by-track breakdown:

360 - The highest charting song out of the new crop, “360” is becoming the de-factor brat anthem. From already classic lines like “I’m everywhere / I’m so Julia” and “You gon’ jump if A.G. made it,” to the unabashed hot-girl confidence, “360” is classic Charli. Using her rogues gallery of hot girl friends to explain her undeniable influence on pop culture is a badass move. The accompanying music video is iconic.
Club classics - The day this came out I was blasting it while speeding down Allen Parkway. Vibing out of my mind. I liked “Von Dutch” but listening to this track for the first time is when I knew Charli was cooking with gas. Another mountain of confidence from her on this track. Singing “I wanna dance with me” goes so incredibly hard. The premise of the song is also so relatable. We have all been to the club when the DJ is playing drab, rejected, EDM tracks with no cultural significance. We want to hear the classics.
Sympathy is a knife - One of my sleeper tracks from the album. Her vocal flourishing during “All this sympathy is just a knife” is breathtaking. The "line “Why I wanna buy a g*n / Why I wanna shoot myself” is truly batshit but hones in her point about the song. Her own self-doubts about her place in the music industry are just enhanced with peoples forced sympathy. Fans have been speculating that this song is a Taylor Swift dig with the line “Don’t want to see her backstage at my boyfriend’s (George of the 1975) show / Fingers crossed behind my back / I hope they break up quick.” Obviously about Taylor and Matty Healy of the 1975’s brief fling. Early in the song Charli laments about not being able to “be her” and being on opposite sides of the pop spectrum. Makes tons of sense with Taylor in mind.
I might say something stupid - From my online perusal this is the most hated(?) song on brat. I understand people love the upbeat club-bangers but the fact that Charli provides us with these moments of brevity. All three “slow” songs bring me to tears and this one is no different. She is just so vulnerable on this track. It is heartbreaking. Alluding that the glitz and glam is a disguise or facade. Singing about not being good enough and being “famous but not quite.” She is worried about belonging and I think it is a universal worry.
Talk Talk - I have been seeing edits of this song to the puke-green iPod touch commercial from the early 2000’s. It fits to a tee. This song is all about the early stages of Charli and George’s relationship and it is both spicy and endearing. The outro of “Talk to me in spanish / talk to me in french / talk to me in your own made-up language” is so infectious. Charli masterfully captures the unspoken words and tension in a early relationship.
Von Dutch - The single that ushered in the brat era, “Von Dutch” feels right at home in the context of the album. I will admit the first time I heard the track I was a little skeptical. Why do you have to explain your iconic-ness? Why can’t you just show it? That key difference is at the very foundation of what brat means. Being unabashedly confident in yourself almost to an off-putting extent. It is a breath of fresh air and something to aspire to. I listen to this song and I’m like “she’s right.” She is my number one.
Everything is romantic - One of the oddest songs off the album on a first listen. “Bad tattoos on leather-tan skin / Jesus christ on a plastic sign.” Like what could that possibly mean? I’ve long since accepted that Charli has a way of just spouting nonsense that sounds incredible. At first I thought that was the case here. But these first few lines echo a sentiment from “Von Dutch.” The comparison between the beautiful and the ugly and our unmatched yearning. Bad tattoos on leather-tan skin is something ugly on something beautiful and the Von Dutch brand is objectively ugly while (at least at the time) being a symbol of wealth. She meanders after this first verse and starts talking about a summer in Naples. It is very surreal. The song ends with her singing “Fall in love again and again” on repeat and her very British pronunciation of again is mind numbing. But I love it.
Rewind - A spiritual successor to “1999” off of Charli, “rewind” takes the nostalgia and makes it a little more personal. Instead of yearning for JT she is yearning for a past where she isn’t famous. The anxiety that accompanies her fame can understandably be a lot at times. I’m sure most famous people wouldn’t trade it for the world but Charli does ache for “simpler time.” These past few songs the heavy topics are punctured with all encompassing electronic beats. Rewind is no different. A little lighter than “Everything is romantic” but still oozing with metallic sheen.
So I - Another absolute gut punch from Charli. Her longtime collaborator and hyperpop icon, Sophie, passed away in 2021 and this song is a anxiety filled response to that event. For all intents and purposes Sophie jumpstarted Charli’s career in 2016 with her production on “Vroom Vroom.” Opening up Charli to new and interesting sounds, they would collaborate on many future projects. “So I” is less of a love letter and more a letter of regret. From the lyrics we can glean that Charli was not as close with Sophie as she wished. The last few chances she had to see Sophie she said “no I’m fine.” The song also references Sophie’s famous “Its Ok to Cry” stating “I know you always said It’s ok to cry / So I know I can cry, I can cry, so I cry.” Pretty brutal stuff.
Girl, So Confusing - Depending on the day, this is my favorite song on the album. The insanely catchy chorus. The messy backstory and fan speculation. It has it all. Honestly the repeated “Girl” choral beat reminds me somewhat of “Girl” by the Beatles. Just putting that out there. The beat almost feels like you are riding a wave of liquid mercury and when the bass arrives your mind cannot think of anything else. The lyrics have caused a ton of fan speculation on what “Girl” Charli is ranting about. The two front-runners are Lorde and Marina and the Diamonds. Both people say are similar to Charli in appearance. “People say we’re alike / Say we have the same hair” Charli sings. They are both “about writing poems” and less party girls than Charli, potentially prompting these schisms. Charli and Marina have an infamous beef that dates back to 2016. Charli seemingly copied (or took heavy inspiration from) the promotional material from Marina’s album FROOT.

This caused a back and forth between the artist but people want to rule Marina out since they have a collab from 2013 and Charli sings “One day we might make some music / the internet would go crazy.” The Lorde beef is really non-existent and stems from an interview where the interviewee ask Charli what it was like writing “Royals.” The fandom takes it a bit too far making numerous post with Lorde saying “love me some boom clap” or “are you that Vroom Vroom girl?” But Lorde does seem the type to be turned off by the intense party girl aesthetic of Charli, at least that is what I thought… Lorde is seldom active on social media but before brat came out she posted on her instagram story the following:

Fanbases collided and there was peace in our time. Lorde also attended the brat tour performance in Brooklyn. My hot take is this song is about neither of them. I think this is her “I Am the Walrus” moment. A little more sensible than that song but she is giving enough crumbs and ambiguity to get multiple fanbases riled up. Masterful work.

Apple - Another sleeper hit in my opinion. The fandom didn’t really know what to do with it at first. Sonically it is pretty different than a lot of brat. Still electronic but almost more straightforward. Charli said that she had Caroline Polachek’s writing style in mind which I adore. This is also the first mention of a car or car-related activities. The next album will be completely about trains just you wait. This song also has deeper themes about split personality and Charli’s continual dismay with her fame and image. Driving is a form of escapism in this song (as it is in a lot of her tracks).
B2b - A provocative single with cover art showing Charli with George in a tantalizing manner. B2b in the electronic music scene where Charli grew up in, means two DJs playing back to back sets. One watching the other. She volleys this into a metaphor about her relationship struggles and not wanting to be the DJ on the sidelines. Another stellar electronic track that really needs to be experienced rather than read :).
Mean girls - This track takes a look into our fascination with the “mean girl” and stan culture in general. The first verse I think is one of the low points of the album (there are not many IMO) as the lyrics just don’t gel with the instrumentals/beat at all. The content is iconic though. Conjuring an image of a girl with “last night makeup” who “worships Lana Del Rey in her airpods.” Before this album Charli seldom used such tangible descriptors and I think that is why it seems out of character here. The subsequent musings on the mean/it girl have said to be inspired by right-wing podcaster Dasha Nekrasova. The actress/model who has been heavily criticized for fetishizing Catholicism among other things. The song musically picks up with a stellar piano interlude and then some razor-sharp electronics in the chorus. An interesting track to say the least.
I think about it all the time - The third heart churner on the album, “I think about it all the time” chronicles Charli’s musings about motherhood and her career. A brutally honest conversation with her partner/herself about the minuteness of her career compared to potentially being a mother. It is very powerful stuff and does feel like you are reading someones diary. The musings start because Charli visits some friends in Stockholm who have just had a child and as she puts it “she is a radiant mother and her is a beautiful father.” The cadence of her vocals though are interesting. It reminds me of another hyperpop/pcmusic staple, Hannah Diamond. The soft childlike vocals create an atmosphere of serenity that is almost spooky. The soft ambient synths add to this effect. The song does all of this heavy lifting while still being incredibly catchy.
365 - The ultimate club banger. What a way to end an album - at the beginning. A remix of sorts of 360, 365 takes away the musings and turns it into a feeling of euphoria. Gone is the anxiety, 365 is all about partying. Charli described it on a podcast as going down different hallways at a club and hearing disparate music in the background. Then once you get to the main room, exploding with sound and vibrance. The varied electronics are the best off the entire album. I have had this stuck in my head for a week and it is not going anywhere. So insane and iconic of her to put a song about doing c*ke right after a song contemplating having a baby. This is this albums “Track 10”, this is this albums “Anthems,” and this is this albums “Vroom Vroom.” Simply a masterpiece to end a masterpiece.

Bonus tracks:

Hello, Goodbye - A similar track thematically to “B2b.” It is nowhere near as good as that song so it is understandable why it was left off the album. The instrumentation feels like a early 2010’s electro-pop reject. It is not terrible but it does give me a slight Coldplay/Chainsmoker vibe.
Guess - My god how could this not be on the main album. Insane provocative, obtusely loud electronic base, and a Pretty In Pink reference. Thematically similar to “360” as the audience is assumed to be obsessed with Charli. From the color of her underwear to her google drive password, we want more! It is the closest to “365” in terms of its pure club-swagger. Insanely good.
Spring Breakers - Some were saying this would be her next “Taxi.” For context “Taxi” is a track off her canceled album, XCX World. Through leaks this has become a fan favorite, even though it is mostly lost to the ethos. “Spring Breakers” was first heard during her boiler room set in February. After brat released, fans were wondering if “Spring Breakers” would suffer a similar fate. Thankfully it didn’t because it channels something so quintessentially Charli. The 2012 A24 film Spring Breakers. The craziness in that movie is very brat coded. The chanting nature of the vocals is reminiscent of True Romance/Sucker era Charli. Another banger for the books.

Thanks for reading :) besos <3

Jonny’s Songs of the Week (I have not been listening to much besides brat ngl):

All of brat (again)
brat but it is the same but there’s three more songs so it’s not
Sabrina Carpenter - Please Please Please
Jamie XX & Robyn - Life
Tove Lo - Heat - EP

Jun 20 Brat dissected

Jul 26 Is brat summer over?

Jun 7 It's a brat summer, babes